Toddler Classes

Generally, I am a big fan of toddler classes (also baby classes - but I don't have one of those anymore).  The classes give structure to my busy day.  They also provide needed stimulation for #3.  Most importantly, for 45-60 minutes I am forced to focus on the child right in front of me.  I am not interrupted to my singing or playing to clear the dishwasher, fold a load of laundry or to let the plumber in.  With three little people in my house - the opportunity to focus on one child for almost an hour is an incredible blessing.  I cherish these times that I can just watch this little boy of mine play, laugh, interact with other kids and snuggle with me without any distractions.  Pure bliss!!!

Recipe Share ~ Pasta Fagioli

Here is one of my favorite go-to recipes.  It only uses ingredients that I always have on hand.  It also is very low fat.  Most importantly, everyone in my family happily eats it!  I like to serve it with a green salad, homemade bread sticks or crackers.  It reheats very well - which is great because I love leftovers!  The pasta in the soup sucks up all the liquid so when heating it the next day I add some water to each bowl of soup.

Pasta Fagioli (from Rachael Ray)

2 T extra-virgin olive oil                                

1 tsp dried rosemary
1 tsp dried thyme                                           

2 dried bay leaves
1 medium onion, finely chopped                   

1 small carrot, chopped
1 rib celery, finely chopped                           

4 large cloves garlic, chopped
Coarse salt and pepper                                  

2 cans cannellini beans
1 cup canned crushed tomatoes                   

2 cups water                        

1 quart veggie stock                                      

1 1/2 cups ditalini (pasta)
Heat a deep pot over medium high heat and add oil, herbs, bay leaf, chopped vegetables, and garlic. Season vegetables with salt and pepper.   Cook until they begin to soften.  Add beans, tomato sauce, water, and stock to pot and raise heat to high. Bring soup to a rapid boil and add pasta. Reduce heat to medium and cook soup, stirring occasionally, 6 to 8 minutes or until pasta is cooked al dente. Remove bay leaf from soup. Let soup rest and begin to cool for a few minutes.

Yield: 6 BIG servings

The Uncertainty of Sleep

When my husband and I had discussions about having kids we talked about money, schools, extra-curricular activities, parenting styles, discipline - but we never talked about sleep.  Or the lack of sleep.  All of our kids were horrible sleepers as infants.  We had to basically hold #1 around the clock on a rotating basis for anyone to get sleep.  Yes, part of that was our issues with being new parents.  Part of it was #1's sleep issues.  We are full believers of Ferber.  Yes, I said it FERBER!  Sometimes, this method is confronted with shame and ridicule.  "How could you let your baby cry?"  Listen, it wasn't easy to hear #1 cry his eyes out.  I actually took to the hallway of our apartment with a bottle of wine the first night we employed the Ferber method.  It was really hard to suffer through that first night.  #1 was up for most of the first night.  But the next night he slept un-swaddled in his own crib in his own room for 12 hours.  We had to Ferberize #2 and #3 - but they weren't as dramatic the first night.  Once we got through the Ferberizing point - and they were eventually weaned from breastfeeding you think the sleep troubles are over....  the thing I am learning is ~ they never are!!!

In our house - all the boys have their own rooms.  #1 and #2 are in beds and #3 is in a crib.  I expect by 8pm for everyone to be in bed and stay there until at the earliest 6:30 am the next day.  This might be totally unrealistic - but this is what I expect.  Some nights and mornings actually go like this.  But you can never predict what will happen.  Last night #2 got out of bed 6 or 7 times over the course of an hour.  At 9pm #1 came into the kitchen asking for water.  5am #2 was screaming - his nightlight was not working and he couldn't find his lovey.  6:00am #1 was too excited for his field trip to sleep.  6:15 - #1-#3 were all up for the day.  What will happen tonight and tomorrow is anyone guess.  All I know is that I need some more coffee!

Weight Watchers - day 1, again!

Being a Mom of three, or a Mom of one, or hey even a woman - there is a constant battle with weight.  I feel like I have been battling it since high school.  Up and down I go.  I go up - and then I recommit to whatever new plan (or old plan) I have.  I make all these promises and plans to myself and others - and somewhere along the line the plan fails.  I fall off the wagon.  I take a slide down - I eat fast food, forget about the gym until I have had enough and then I recommit again.  It is a vicious cycle that I am having trouble breaking and that has provided me little success.

Even before my pregnancies I had these issues and with the weight gain of pregnancy things got even harder.  With #1 we did IVF, which came with a lot of drugs and 10 lbs before I even got pregnant.  Then I let lose!  55 lbs later we had a beautiful baby boy!  18 months later, a friend convinced me to join the gym and I was able to lose 65 lbs.  All of the IVF weight and baby weight.  Pregnant with #2 I was too busy to chow down as I had before.  Only 35 lbs.  I was able to shed those fairly quickly and then start attacking the extra weight I had been trying to get rid of since my post-wedding gain.  I was pregnant with #3 and gained about 40.  Here we are - 18 months after #3 and it has been a roller coaster.

I won't go into all the little ups and downs on the scale.  The really frustrating thing is that the things that had worked after #1 and #2 are not enough now.  I am not 28 or 30 anymore.  I am 34 and my body is not cooperating as it used to.  I am worried that to get the weight loss I want I am going to have to go to the gym 5 times a week and have my eating near perfect.  With three young kids I cannot wrap my head around how this is possible.  I got on the scale this morning and the number glaring back at me set me in a tailspin today.  But giving up, doesn't feel like a real option to me.  What else can I do but try.

I am putting my goals out there with the hopes that it will help me stick to them.  I am going to try really logging all my food.  I just adjusted my weight watcher points to reflect the fact that I am no longer breastfeeding.  26 points is soooooo low!  I am going to drink my water.  I am going to try to exercise 5 times a week.  I am going to do this for the next 30 days and see how I am doing.  Let's do this!!!   

Traditions - Shabbat

I think traditions are so important in a family.  They do not need to be religious - just something that the kids can expect to happen, look forward to and that brings the family together.  We have a lot of religious and non-religious traditions that we try to follow.  Our most common religious tradition is shabbat.  Every friday night, either at our home or a relatives or friends house, we say a prayer to light two candles, my husband then blesses each child (in age order), we say a prayer over the wine and finally a prayer over challah.  We then eat dinner and try to reflect on the past week.  When my husband and I were first dating we would do our "highs and lows of the day."  We would each tell the other one great thing that happened (the high) and one not so great thing (the low).  As our lives got more and more hectic we reduced the frequency to  the "highs and lows of the week."  Very often the high is - "I jumped so high."  And the low is - "I fell down."  Or the high and the low were things that happened that day.  We then try to give some suggestions.  "Maybe your high could be your birthday party that was on Sunday."  What I like about it, is that we all get to express how are time that week has been.  We get to connect to one another - which is something so special - I hope we keep up with all of our shabbat practices.

Mom gym time

Mom time is so important!  In the beginning I had such a hard time taking this time for myself.  #1 was 18 months old and a friend of mine told me straight out that I had to join this gym with her because I needed sometime to myself.  I really didn't want to.  I never liked going to the gym.  It was really expensive and I would have to leave #1 in the nursery there - which is something I had never done before.  Up until this point he had only been left with immediate relatives.  My friend would not give up - she even threatened to call my mother!  I finally agreed.  It was heart wrenching leaving him for the first time.  For the first couple of weeks he would cry for the first 5 minutes - but he would then find a toy and go on his way.  I was free!!!!  Well, I couldn't leave the building and I had to be exercising.  But running on the treadmill while watching tv having no child on top of me and then taking a shower by myself - truly felt like heaven!  Today, I still drag them all to the gym.  I need it for my health and sanity.  I think the time is running out on how much longer I can take #1.  But I will take it while I can.

Playgroups

I am not exaggerating when I say playgroups were the reason I survived my first year of motherhood.  When I had my first baby at 28, I didn't feel young - I felt ready.  What I didn't realize was that none of my friends had babies - and this was a big problem!  I had no one I could go to for advice.  I had no one I could go to who understood what I was going through and could really sympathize.  The day my husband went to work after his paternity leave, I stayed inside all day with my perfect little baby boy and cried my eyes out.  I felt so alone and scared.  Thankfully, I found a new mom's group and launched into mom friend making mode.  Making friends is never easy - and it always takes work.  But the work was worth it.  Once I realized I could get out of the house and survive on my own, I went to every group I could find.  Eventually, our new mom's group continued out on our own for a couple of more years.

With every new baby, I have gone to classes and tried to make new mom friends.  I did this so I could have friends with a kid the same age as mine.  It is always so helpful to be around people and kids going through the same things at the same time.  Even though I have done much of this before - it is easy to forget what the should or should not be eating or activities they should be doing.  It is also great for kids who are not in a daycare setting to be around kids their own ages - to begin to share, play and interact.  Thank you to all the moms from 6 years ago when #1 was born and to the moms now who enrich my life, make me a better parent and keep me going.

No sick days for Mom

I think, one of the hardest things about being a mom is not having sick days.  If the stay-at-home mom is sick lunch still needs to be made, the kids still need to go to school, basically life as normal needs to happen for the kids.  It is the worst!  Today, I desperately needed a sick day.  I have a horrible head cold - the only thing I wanted was far from my reach - a day, no even just a couple of hours tucked in my bed, with netflix and a box of tissues.

When things have been really bad I have reached out for help from my mother-in-law who lives in town, or my mother who lives a 4 hour car ride away.  I have even asked friends to help drive the kids around.  I am always so hesitant to ask for help from other Moms.  The last thing I would ever want to do, would be to give my germs to my friends.  

So I made it through the day - NyQuil is calling.  My husband is on tonight if any of the little ones wake up.